I Am A Woman

After completing my graduation and working for two years I was married to the man I chose. Things became pretty different. When I used to wake up, I could see my parents, my siblings and my own people before my marriage. I saw a person beside me who had no blood relation but was caring at the same time could feel the pride in possessing me. I had to be busy with paper works changing my last name. Why did I change my last name? Is it because I am a woman?

Now that I was at a new place, completely uprooted from the birth place, I started with new food habits, new likings and new ways of talking and also had to think twice before I said something. Lots of sacrifice, lots of responsibilities and lots more which I never thought of. I started observing, nothing changed for my husband. He was at his place, with his own people. I had to let them know before going to my place. Why was this? Is it because I am a woman?

The day came when I became a mother. I had to go through the terrible pain which almost every mother had at the time of becoming a mother. My husband came with a smiling face and at the same time with his caring hands tried to hold my hands before the birth of my child. The pain made me annoyed; I stared at him and then with an angry tone asked him: “I think you are happy because you are about to become a father, why not sharing my pain?” When my son was born I forgot the pain. Like the rest of other women in the world, I was happy. It was the ‘first rice taking ceremony’ of my son. We thought of inviting our friends and relatives to be a part of the ceremony. A card was printed, people were invited. My son grew up. I showed him his pictures. I showed him the card. The card read my in-laws’ names along with my husband’s name and yes, it also had my son’s name. I read once, twice, thrice….but where is my name? It did not have my name. I was so busy with my family, loving all members of the family that I did not look at this. Why did nobody think of mentioning my name? Is it because I am a woman?

After coming back from work place, I could not sleep much. Nobody asked me to wake up however, it was my inner feeling of motherhood, responsible woman that forced me to wake up with only four to five hours of sleep. On the other hand, I would see my husband sleeping for seven to eight hours with no worries, not much of responsibility. Why am I so worried to make a perfect home? Is it because I am a woman?

After all these years I have come to know the greatest truth about woman. I am happy to be a woman as, woman, god’s most beautiful creation on earth is a symbol of

W-WISDOM

O-ORIGIN

M-MOTHERHOOD

A-ADORABLE
N-NO NUISANCES

“Women have strengths that amaze men. They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy. They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry. They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous. They fight for what they believe in. They stand up to injustice. They don’t take ‘no’ for an answer when they believe there is a better solution. They go without so their family can have. They go to the doctor with a frightened friend. They love unconditionally. They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards. They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding. Their hearts break when a friend dies. They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.”

My heart is filled with love. I am happy to be what I am. I am happy to be a woman.

Tips in Life that Lead to Happiness.

Are we truly happy? Do we even know what it means to be happy and what it takes to achieve happiness? These are some important questions for all. To maintain my own happiness I try my best not to cause unhappiness to anyone else. If we want to be happy we need to understand that we can be happy and that we should be happy. Some people believe that they don’t deserve happiness and accept their unhappy state as their destiny. The truth is that happiness, like anything else in life, needs to be nurtured.

“The best vitamin to be a happy person is B1.”

The following are a few tips that can be followed to create happiness in a life:

• Stay healthy: When one is not well, it is difficult to be happy. Problems with our health can be the cause of many worries in life. So we should take care of our body, eat healthy food and enjoy a good health.
  
• Make healthy relationships: Healthy marriage, great family and good friendships are good ways to attain happiness in life. Everything may not be perfect but we can always do something about it. Let us remember, happiness is a choice. We should surround ourselves with happy people. It is easy to begin to think negatively when we are surrounded by people who think that way. Conversely, if we are around people who are happy their emotional state will be infectious.
• Do what you enjoy: We should spend time in doing what we enjoy. If our passion is writing, we should spend some time writing. If we love swimming or we enjoy teaching the children, we should find ways to enjoy our passion.
• Get out of debt: Finances should be managed. We should not spend more than what we can afford. At times it is observed; people have no choice when it comes to medical emergency. It is advisable to always take precautionary measures: mediclaims and small savings.
• Know how to deal with stress: These days stress has been a major part of our lives. Stress with family problems and stress from a demanding work - they are all around. As we all know happiness is a choice, do not let stress overrule our lives. Some creative ways are to be worked out to relieve stress. We should practice meditation and practice deep relaxation.
• Help others: One should volunteer to help others with their needs. When we do this, we realize that there are more people who need our attention than being too focused on our selfish goals in lives.
• Share: We know that sharing can make a big difference. We can give somebody a little joy by sharing our abilities and what we have - we will feel that happiness in us. One of the good ways to be happy is the joy of giving.
  
• Enjoy simple things: Happiness sometimes comes from simple things in life: a good time with our pet dog, a flower blooming in our garden or the joys of cooking our favorite recipe.
• Be Thankful: We should count our blessings. Focusing on what we have achieved is important. Instead of thinking what we want to have in life, let us make a list or even a mental list of what we already have and be thankful for it. Being appreciative of the blessing we have will tend to attract more of it.
• Sense of humour: Finding the humour in situations can also lead to happiness. At times it is required to be serious; however, when it is appropriate, we should find a way to make light of a situation that would otherwise make us unhappy.
  
• Look for a solution: When something goes wrong let us try to figure out a solution instead of wallowing in self pity. Truly happy people don’t allow set backs to affect their mood because they know that with a little thought they can turn the circumstances back to their favour.

Love

Love is the emotion of strong affection and personal attachment. Some say it is mysterious, magical, complex, difficult, imaginary, thought-provoking, inspirational, intuitional, joyous, immeasurable, ecstasy, and undefinable.

In a classic book titled Colors of Love (1973), J. A. Lee defined six varieties of relationship that might be labeled love:

Eros is romantic, passionate, love— In this type of relationship, love is life's most important thing. Lee said a search for physical beauty or an ideal type also typifies this type of love.

Ludus is a game-playing or uncommitted love. Lying is part of the game. A person who pursues ludic love may have many conquests but remains uncommitted.

Storge (STORE-gay) is a slow developing, friendship-based loved. People with this type of relationship like to participate in activities together. Often storge results in a long-term relationship in which sex might not be very intense or passionate.

Pragma is a pragmatic, practical, mutually beneficial relationship. It may be somewhat unromantic. A person who leans toward this type of relationship may look for a partner at work or where the person is spending time. Sex is likely to be seen as a technical matter needed for producing children, if they are desired.

Mania is an obsessive or possessive love, jealous and extreme. A person in love this way is likely to do something crazy or silly, such as stalking. The movie Fatal Attraction was about this type.

Agape (a-GOP-aye) is a gentle, caring, giving type of love, brotherly love, not concerned with the self. It is relatively rare. Mother Theresa showed this kind of love for impoverished people.

Why Is Love Important? Love is important because without it life has no meaning or purpose. Love allows us to be more and do more than we could ever accomplish without its power. Love is a beautiful feeling that express affection, honesty and at the same time friendship. Around the world people are concerned about solutions for many of social problems. Problems that include world hungry and violence are some example of social matters that love could solve.

Some famous quotes on love are:

The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread.  ~Mother Teresa

Only in love are unity and duality not in conflict.  ~Rabindranath Tagore

Character Protects Life

It is rightly said that CHARACTER is the foundation for all true success. A person may have position, money or power, but unless he has "good" character she or he is not considered to be truly successful.

Character is said to be "the stable and distinctive qualities built into an individual's life which determine his or her response regardless of circumstances."
Abraham Lincoln said, "Reputation is the shadow. Character is the tree." Our character is not just what we try to display for others to see, it is who we are even when no one is watching. Good character is doing the right thing because it is right to do what is right.
Character is a "complex of mental and ethical traits" and those qualities or traits are "built into an individual's life." These determine a person's response in any given situation.
If we were to make a list of good "character traits" or good” character qualities," our list would include words as: 

•     Honesty
•     Integrity
•     Depend  ability
•     Loyalty
•     Enthusiasm

There are many more that could be added to this.
We can focus on building qualities if we break character down into its basic elements. This helps us to improve our overall character. Honesty is a good quality, for example, that really consists of several more basic qualities – dependability, truthfulness, diligence, etc. Therefore, when a person works on becoming more honest, he does so by becoming more dependable, more diligent, and more truthful.
Today’s world faces many difficult problems such as:
Escalating crime, drug and alcohol abuse, workplace violence, gang activity, vandalism, school dropouts, deteriorating work ethics, domestic violence, juvenile delinquency, racial tensions, broken families...
The list seems endless.
Due to lack or misapplication of good character qualities, all of these problems spring out. We must deal with these roots to find lasting solutions to the problems in day to day life. We must work to improve our own character, teach good character to our children, and help those around us to improve their character!  Character development is essential to the ongoing success of our society. That is why Character Education is so important. Character is the Key to Success!
Our character is defined by what we do, not what we say or believe. There is a famous quote by Bruce Lee “Knowledge will give you power, but character respect.”
Some qualities required to protect character are:

• Alertness: Being aware of what is taking place around me so I can have the right responses
• Attentiveness: Showing the worth of a person or task by giving my undivided concentration
• Availability: Making my own schedule and priorities secondary to the wishes of those I serve
• Benevolence: Giving to others’ basic needs without having as my motive personal reward
• Boldness: Confidence to say or do what is true, right and just
• Cautiousness: Knowing the importance of right timing in accomplishing right actions
• Compassion: Investing whatever is necessary to heal the hurts of others
• Contentment: Realizing that true happiness does not depend on material conditions
• Creativity: Approaching a need, a task, or an idea from a new perspective
• Decisiveness: The ability to recognize key factors and finalize difficult decisions
• Deference: Limiting my freedom so I do not offend the tastes of those around me
• Dependability: Fulfilling what I consented to do, even if it means unexpected sacrifice
• Determination: Purposing to accomplish right goals at the right time, regardless of the opposition
• Diligence: Investing all my energy to complete the tasks assigned to me
• Discernment: Understanding the deeper reasons why things happen
• Discretion: Recognizing and avoiding words, actions, and attitudes that could bring undesirable consequences
• Endurance: The inward strength to withstand stress and do my best
• Enthusiasm: Expressing joy in each task as I give it my best effort
• Faith: Confidence that actions rooted in good character will yield the best outcome, even when I cannot see how
• Flexibility: Willingness to change plans or ideas without getting upset
• Forgiveness: Clearing the record of those who have wronged me and not holding a grudge
• Generosity: Carefully managing my resources so I can freely give to those in need
• Gentleness: Showing consideration and personal concern for others
• Gratefulness: Letting others know by my words and actions how they have benefited my life
• Honour: Respecting others because of their worth as human beings
• Hospitality: Cheerfully sharing food, shelter, and friendship with others
• Humility: Acknowledging that achievement results from the investment of others in my life
• Initiative: Recognizing and doing what needs to be done before I am asked to do it
• Joyfulness: Maintaining a good attitude, even when faced with unpleasant conditions
• Justice: Taking personal responsibility to uphold what is pure, right and true
• Loyalty: Using difficult times to demonstrate my commitment to those I serve
• Meekness: Yielding my expectations in order to benefit others
• Obedience: Quickly and cheerfully carrying out the direction of those who are responsible for me
• Orderliness: Arranging myself and my surroundings to achieve greater efficiency
• Patience: Accepting a difficult situation without giving a deadline to remove it
• Persuasiveness: Guiding vital truths around another person's mental roadblocks
• Punctuality: Showing respect for other people and their time
• Resourcefulness: Making wise use of what others might overlook or discard
• Responsibility: Knowing and doing what is expected of me
• Security: Structuring my life around that which cannot be destroyed or taken away
• Self-Control: Rejecting wrong desires and doing what is right
• Sensitivity: Using my senses to perceive the true attitudes and emotions of others
• Sincerity: Eagerly doing what is right with transparent motives
• Thoroughness: Knowing what factors will diminish the effectiveness of my work or words, if neglected
• Thriftiness: Allowing myself and others to spend only what is necessary
• Tolerance: Accepting others at different levels of maturity
• Truthfulness: Earning future trust by accurately reporting past facts
• Virtue: The moral excellence evident in my life as I consistently do what is right
• Wisdom: Making practical application of truth in daily decisions

“Character is doing the right thing when nobody's looking.  There are too many people who think that the only thing that's right is to get by, and the only thing that's wrong is to get caught. “~J.C. Watts

Suggestions for Working Mothers.

For many working mothers, the work life balance is one of life’s greatest challenges. While men often feel conflicted between workplace and fatherhood demands as well, women usually suffer from more than their fair share of the burden of balancing family and work life

Why is it so? For one thing, society puts unrealistic expectations on women to be “perfect” mothers. In addition, there’s a huge double standard.Men don’t lose credibility among coworkers when they have children, but women do. Many women feel they have to work harder in the workplace to demonstrate their commitment. The result is that women feel the need to buckle down at their jobs at the same time as they are raising a young child.

So how does a woman balance work with family? There’s no easy answer to this question that impacts countless women. Hence I look forward from all the readers to share their day to day rich and positive experience so that we, working women can have a lot of suggestions.

Meditation

If you go to your Doctor for stress related problems, she or he will likely tell you that perhaps the best treatment for stress is Meditation. They will suggest that you start meditating and this leads you to two problems. The first is where to get appropriate direction in how to meditate. By finding Meditation Station, you've already solved that problem. The other is understanding exactly what Meditation is.

Meditation is a mental discipline by which the practitioner attempts to get beyond the reflexive,"thinking" mind into a deeper state of relaxation or awareness.Meditation is a component of many religions, and has been practiced since antiquity. It is also practiced outside religious traditions.Different meditative disciplines encompass a wide range of spiritual or psycho-physical practices that may emphasize different goals—from achievement of a higher state of consciousness, to greater focus,creativity or self-awareness, or simply a more relaxed and peaceful frame of mind.

An ordinary person may consider meditation as a worship or prayer. However, it is not so. Meditation means awareness. Whatever you do with awareness is meditation. "Watching your breath" is meditation;listening to the birds is meditation. As long as these activities are free from any other distraction to the mind, it is effective meditation.

The Benefits of Meditation:

The benefits of meditation are manifold. When practicing meditation, your heart rate and breathing slow down, your blood pressure normalizes, you use oxygen more efficiently, and you sweat less. Also, your adrenal glands produce less cortisol, your mind ages at a slower rate, and your immune function improves. Your mind also clears and your creativity increases.People who meditate regularly find it easier to give up life-damaging habits like smoking, drinking and drugs.

Pros Of Meditation:

Meditation is wonderful in that it’s free, always available, and amazingly effective in short-term stress reduction and long-term health. Benefits can be felt in just one session. An experienced teacher isn’t necessary; you can learn to meditate from a book or from the resources on this site.

The Cons of Meditation:

It does take some practice, however, and some people find it difficult to"get it" in the beginning. It also requires a little patience, and maybe difficult for people with little free time (like some stay-at-home mothers who get little privacy from small children). However, the time and effort it takes to learn and practice is well worth it in terms of the benefits it provides.

Arguments for Meditation

• Meditation is an ancient & cross-cultural technique. Anything this old and widely accepted must be valuable.
• Meditation can lead to a direct and profound knowledge concerning Reality.
• This aforementioned knowledge can utterly transform ones relationship to Reality and to oneself.
• Meditation often gives many other empirically verified benefits, both physiological and psychological in nature.
• Beyond these empirically verified benefits there may be many other benefits for the meditator.
• Meditation, like any other endeavor, can help create meaning and purpose in ones life and connect one to others who share in this meaning.

Argument against Meditation

• Meditation in all of its guises are simply the remnants of pre-modern, antiquated, and sadly uninformed cultures and religions,many of which were the cause of great harm in the world.
• Meditation can lead to disengagement with the world, sapping the world of precious human resources.
• There are many ways of living a meaningful and healthy life without engaging in meditation techniques.
• Meditation can lead to profound confusion and dissociation just as easily as it can lead to a “profound realization,” and who’s to say they aren’t the same thing?
• If there is some profound truth about Reality that people are capable of realizing, why would they have to meditate to do so? If it’s true, then it’s true whether or not someone “meditates.”
• The very act of becoming a so called “meditator” can become yet another obstacle and block to the realization which many meditators pursue.

In “Against Meditative Knowledge”by Rabindranath Tagore, the poet says :
"Those who wish to sit, shut their eyes,
and meditate to know if the world’s true or lies,
may do so. It’s their choice. But I meanwhile
with hungry eyes that can’t be satisfied
shall take a look at the world in broad daylight." (1896)
Buddha in 'Pleasure' says:
"Whoever gives oneself to distractions
and does not give oneself to meditation,
forgetting true purpose and grasping at pleasure,
will eventually envy the one who practices meditation."

So it varies from person to person, how you do it, when you do it. Would request all the readers to write a few words about your views